End of first week back at work

Life is getting back to normal socially and professionally but with my new way of eating this is my second life :) When you worked so hard for a second chance, it's harder to take it for granted and even when I forget every now and then, remembering my little band makes me smile. I am happy :)

I won't lie, first day back at work was agony. I don't think I was ready just yet but it got better every day and by the end of the week I barely felt the incisions hurt when I moved and I had more energy. I think pain makes you tired.

I had soups and little pots of low fat low sugar puddings at work with the odd Slim Fast. I find that I can tolerate them now, maybe it was such a problem when I was having such a huge amount of milk during pre-op diet.

I found drinking enough a bit of a problem this week. I am struggling to keep my liquid intake high enough. Most I managed was 1.7 litres. Weather being rubbish doesn't help and I get full up so quickly, I can't really finish any drink. I should be sipping non stop all day to get enough fluids in and I simply forget to. Checking the colour of my urine every time, it's not dark at all, I think I really didn't need as much liquids?

I find myself getting hungry during the day too. I eat/drink something and I get full easily so it's good but my stomach must be healing well so I take the hunger as a positive thing :)

I was sick and tired of soup this week though so I mixed gravy in and liquidised normal food into thin purees. Really helped. I could barely manage 1/4 of a meal for 1 foods per meal so that's also great. I've treated myself to M&S food a couple of times this week, it was lovely.

I still shower with waterproof plasters on my incisions and remove them immediately after the shower. I'm holding on to the glue like a security blanket. Terrified of getting them infected so I try not to touch them but I feel they are quite scabby and dry on the top now. Looks like they will peel very shortly. Not worried at all about scarring although I feel like one of them might scar a bit. A tiny price to pay for a huge improvement :)

I lost 34 pounds since my consultation day with Dr Super, which was exactly 6 weeks ago, average 5-6 lb a week. This is amazing, I've never managed to stick to a diet this long and lose this much in one go. I dropped one size already and can't wait for more! I was a bit disappointed with my loss after the surgery though - only 4 lb in the last two weeks. I've lost more on the pre-op! I will not worry though, this must be a result of the starvation mode. I'm aiming for 1000 calories a day this week and hopefully it will make a difference.

I'm finding it very inconvenient to exercise, lol. I used to walk to work and back in my pre-op and it helped a lot. 60 min walk in total, great exercise. But now it's dark and miserable and wet and cold... I would be scared to walk back home after work in the dark. Not that it's dodgy or anything it's just really dark, that road can get pitch black at night! I remember once we were walking home from town after a night out with my husband and we almost fell a couple of times - not cos we were drunk but because you couldn't see the pavement!

In the last couple of days, I spent my lunch hour walking around in town. If it's raining then I go to the shopping centre and walk up and down there :) I don't want to sign up for a gym because we're moving in the new year and they contract for a year. There's The Gym Group where they don't require annual contracts but the problem with that is, it's tiny and apparently packed pretty much all the time and you have to wait for your turn on the gym equipment. I don't feel healed enough to hop on the elliptical trainer yet anyway...

I'll sign up for the gym where we'll move in the new year and I'll go back to swimming. The most success I had with dieting and exercising was a few years back when we swam every morning before work with my husband. Sadly now he works in London and he doesn't have time in the mornings and he doesn't have energy in the evenings... And I really don't want to go swimming on my own before I lose another 30 pounds!

Mushies next week, eeek! I'm scared of eating anything that is not a puree... Dr Superman said take it easy and don't rush. I think I'd only have soft food at home to begin with, just in case. Stick to softer stuff at work for another couple of days maybe...

Going back to work successfully done, what's next challenge? Christmas?  :)  xxx

Things are better on 2nd day at work

Yesterday was much better than the first day at work. In the morning I had a training so it was all fun and cool. Afterwards I came home for lunch, had a meatball soup, yummy! Then before I went back to work for another 3-4 hours, I remembered to take a big sip of my baby paracetamol. This time although i still got the back ache nearer the end of the day, it was nowhere near as bad as yesterday.

I had a funny moment today while driving to work after my lunch... I felt so happy suddenly and I burst into tears... Seriously, what's all this soppiness about?! I'm grateful I'm alive and my aches are more manageable and I dropped a dress size - all good stuff :)

Wind built up again and put pressure on my back and chesty before I went to bed so I took some paracetamol and fell into a peaceful sleep... only to be woken up by a soppy cat, purring and licking my face :) It took me a little while to go back to sleep because I noticed my back ached quite a bit but hey I did manage to sleep some more in the end.

Today I'm working from home and realising that my hunger is creeping back in. My swelling must have gone down and I must be healing on the inside. I rang THG and asked when I can have my dietician appointment and my fist fill but they said November dates haven't been released yet so they'll ring me as soon as they are available, pffft. I just want to know when things are to happen. I'm a planner, I'm a project manager, I'm an excel sheet queen, I have to know these things!

This is what I ate yesterday:

07:30 am - Innocent smoothie, pineapples, bananas and coconuts (160ml)
08:00 am - Liquid porridge with 5g Ready Brek, 1/4 banana, 2.5g of sultanas and 75g semi skimmed milk cooked in microwave and blended until smooth
10:00 am - Small soya latte with light Alpro Soya
14:00 pm - Soup made by liquidising a meatball in a cup of hot water and a teaspoon of gravy powder (Bisto roast lamb)
15:30 pm - Tea with a drop of skimmed milk (hald almost half)
16:30 pm - Shape delights velvety chocolate
19:00 pm - Soup made by liquidising a tablespoon of Sainsbury's Taste the Difference Lamb Moussaka in a cup of hot water with a teaspoon of gravy powder (nicked from husband's dinner, it was yummy hehe) (115 cal)
20:00 pm - Petit filous

Water: Only 2 glasses :(

Total calories: 739kcal

Exercise: 20 min slow pace walk - not good, need a min of 30 minutes every day but I had a training session in the morning and had to drive everywhere

First day back at work and my trousers

Yesterday it was my first day back at work. Mentally I was ready for it, partly because I know how hectic everything will get at work in the next couple of weeks and also because I don't want to be the sick person healing at home anymore, I want to throw myself back at normal life and continue the food challenge with the help of my band. So yes, mentally I was more than ready but physically, later in the day I found out, not so much...

I took a shower Sunday night - my first shower after the surgery. My husband washed my hair and I washed my body with a sponge before so I wasn't stinky or anything but an actual shower, oooh it was heavenly! I was worried about soaking my glued incisions as I'd like to keep the glue on them as long as possible as a security blanket so I covered them with little waterproof plasters. Removed them immediately afterwards so they can 'breathe'. Straightened my hair and shaped my eyebrows for the first time after the op, getting ready to go back to professional life :P

There was a few things I was worried about... The bruises on my both hands, getting wind pain and tiredness. I managed to hide my hands in a long sleeved cardi which isn't actually too loose so it doesn't make me look like an emo teenager :P Plus I don't have the hideous haircut or the funny make-up and I hardly looked like a teenager!

 

Wind pain hit me in the afternoon after having my soup and I was indeed very very tired - again, in the afternoon...

I find that after walking for 10 minutes or so, I get a bad back ache. Is this because I try not to use my abdominal muscles I wonder? My back was killing me in the afternoon and I had to take a co-codomol when I got home. It was fine in a few minutes, I didn't care :)

Right, the morning of my first day back at work I had a little surprise. Usually I wear comfy palazzo trousers made of loose jersey fabric with an elasticated waist in the house or out and about. But I have my decent tailored trousers for work. Obviously I haven't worn them in the last 10 days or and when I put them on, they didn't fit! They fell down to my ankles!!! YAY!!! That was an amazing moment! I've been at this size for the last year or so and it's a big thing for me. I have other pairs for 3-4 different sizes in my wardrobe, patiently waiting for the day to be used again so I picked one size down and put it on nervously. Would it be too tight? Would it go up my tree trunks? Oh yes - it was a perfect fit! I rang my husband to give him the news and he was worried, he thought something happened to me on the way to work or something and I said of course something happened to me, this is big news! 

I thought about walking to work but then I changed my mind and drove, just incase I got very tired at work. It was a good call, I did indeed get mega tired in the afternoon. It's a 5 minute walk from the car park to the office but with my current speed, it took me 10 minutes. I went out for a walk at lunch and in total I walked for an hour. 

I wonder if it's the yogurt soup giving me the gas after eating so I made something different for dinner. Husband had a couple of meatballs leftover so I liquidised one with lots of gravy and it tasted divine! Lovely dinner, yum yum yum. I also enjoy Danone shape delights nowadays, they come in dark choc or white choc and they are both lovely. It slides down easily and helps up the calories. It's low fat and only 108 kcal a pot. I had 2 yesterday and an ice lolly which is only 25kcal.

Yesterday I had:

09:30 am - Sainsbury's smoothie (banana, pineapple and coconut)

11:00 am - Cup of tea with a drop of skimmed milk (managed 1/4 mug)

14:00 pm - Yogurt soup (200ml)

16:00 pm - Shape delights velvety chocolate

17:00 pm - Coffee with soya milk (managed 1/2 mug)

19:00 pm - Soup made by liquidising a meatball in a teaspoon of gravy powder and hot water

20:00 pm - Shape delights white choc

21:00 pm - Ice lolly

Total 580kcal

All pain aside, good to be back at work :) x

Little happy moments

Yesterday, I could put my socks on myself and I drove for the first time which obviously involves getting in and out of the car alright. Funny how such little things make you happy! Took my car to the garage for an MOT and walked back home and picked it up in the afternoon so that's half an hour walk done for the day :)

Today I'm going back to work and life is getting back to normal again.

Last week was probably one of the most emotional times of our lives, both husband and I are pretty shaken and keep having "wow, what have we done!" moments, not regretful at all mind you, it was just a big thing to do and when you're in the flow of things you don't realise straight away. Obviously I spend a lot of time on WLSurgery.com forums but my other half was not as informed as I was but I feel like we've done well :)

Here's to the rest of my life, feeling normal with my little band cuddling my tummy :) x

Bowel movements and a Sunday roast

What a shitty subject to talk about :) Oh well, it's all part of being human and even the hottest models and the queen take a dump on a regular basis!

On my 3-week pre-op milk and yogurt diet, I had the runs pretty much all the time. Firstly because I couldn't tolerate that much lactose (still can't) and after cutting lactose it's still been on the softer side but when all you consume is liquid, what goes out is also liquid, it's only normal.

After my op, I couldn't do it until the 5th day or so. Main reasons were: 1. I didn't eat much so there wasn't enough to come out, 2. I was on co-codomol which gives you constipation, 3. I was scared to try because my incisions hurt.

When I managed to go on the 5th day post-op, it was a very small piece of a very dark colour goo. Apparently this is normal. It didn't hurt to 'push' though so maybe if I tried, I could have done it sooner.

Afterwards, I just had an episode last night, which wasn't pleasant at all...

See, my husband is a lovely man and he loves and supports me. He's been very patient with me during my pre-op and he hasn't cooked anything in the house and he didn't bring any smelly food with him. I was so bored of milk and yogurt at the time, even the cat food smelled delicious lol! Even in the hospital when he had to eat something he ate it in the bathroom - didn't want to leave me, bless him. So it's only fair and understandable when he asked permission yesterday if he could cook himself a Sunday roast and I said of course he could, he's been super so far and he deserves it.

I even helped him prepare (he's a little clumsy) and supervised and made sure he cleaned after himself :) But I didn't realise everything would smell so yummy! Of course it would, why wouldn't it? And of course he had to have my favorite meat - lamb... Arghhhhhh!

 Image from Wikipedia

I've been very good though, I didn't eat anything. The potatoes roasted so nicely, all crisp on the outside and fluffy inside... Bastard, he's so good at roasting potatoes :) The smells watered my mouth... So I reached for the home made gravy and ate a couple of spoonfuls. That was all I could have and I did have it.

Shortly after, I had the worst wind pain since the op. I was almost tearful, it hurt so much. A big pressure on my chest and on my back plus a rumbling stomach... The gravy must have been too rich for my poor post-op tummy to cope with. I started walking up and down the house, climbed up and down the stairs, took some painkiller and my husband rubbed my back.

Finally in an hour or two, which felt like eternity, I managed to fart. Then I had to run to the loo and sit there for a while. Diarrhea... where did that come from?? It was very light yellow and water consistency. Afterwards, I felt sooo much better. Pain was gone but it left me exhausted so I went to bed to lie down for a bit, only to pass out in a couple of seconds.

I woke up at 5am this morning and felt the need to go again. Same as last night. Hopefully this will be the last and I promise to stick to clearer liquids for a couple of days, no more rich soups or stupid gravy of the stupid Sunday roast that smelled heavenly, bleh...

I just noticed the time... Last week this time, I was sitting in the reception of Dolan Park hospital, shaking with nerves. Time does fly :) x

Post-Op Recovery - Week 1

This is the 7th day of my laparoscopic (key hole) gastric band surgery, I can't believe how time flies :)

When I started this blog I promised myself to keep a diary every single day and record everything I eat and drink to keep it very honest even though I knew there would be times I fail. My head has been all over the place since my surgery and I can't even last through a 20-min episode of my favorite TV series let alone sit down to write a post...

So instead I thought I'll do a review of the recovery in my first week post-op. I have been posting on WLSurgery.com forums so I thought I'll combine my posts here and they sum up my week:

Monday, 15th Oct '12:

I'm alive! X

~ ~ ~

I am now a proud owner of a 10ml band with a 1ml fill thanks to my Superman surgeon Mr Paul Super :)

A bit sore where the port is and wind pain is a bitch but overall I'm feeling much better than I thought I would.

I went in at 10:30 and been waken up in the recovery room and taken to my room. I thought I just arrived when I opened my eyes but apparently I slept for a couple of hours!

I had half a cup of water and a cup of peppermint tea so far and I'm on seconds now. I can't believe how easily I can sip.

No nausea, yay! I have a swollen lip which isn't painful just the top bit is swollen to a pea size. And my scalp is itchy! Apparently morphine does that, how bizzare...

Everyone here at Dolan Park are so lovely and even though I went to the op theatre in tears, I was laughing by the time I was lying down!

I'm very happy :)

Tobi xxx

~ ~ ~

I napped on and off until half an hour ago. A nurse came to help me get up, change into pyjamas (deffo pjs by the way, couldn't get comfy in nighty). They changed my bedding too, it was covered in iodine.

Walking was agony. The two larger incisions hurt a LOT! Like a tugging stretching sensation. One is the port and other is where they poked around with the camera.

Wind pain is in the middle of my back, on the left mostly. The gastric band specialist nurse said it must be stuck behind my lungs :(

I took Windeze and sucked it although she said when it's almost finish, spit it out don't try to chew and swallow.

Not sure if it's the stronger painkiller she gave me or Windeze but it feels a bit better. Actually feels like it will make me sleep shortly :P

I can hear the sheep baaaa and birds chirp outside my room, its so nice, I keep the window open :)

Yay for my new life!! X

~ ~ ~

... he (Dr Paul Super, my surgeon) was so lovely today before and after the op. Apparently my liver shrunk good and he was very pleased with my weight loss.

I did manage to get up and walk around the corridors and thanks to whatever that anise flavoured painkiller is, it didn't hurt and felt so good.

I had a cup of chicken soup afterwards - it was heaven!!!

One thing to note is that i am not allowed to use a hot water bottle as it might cause bleeding. It helped a lot with the wind pain on my back before i had to stop using it.

Also not allowed to use ibuprofen for the next two weeks, only paracetamol, with or without codeine.

Next challenge is to pee. I managed two drops, sorry if TMI, but i can't pass the rest.

My mouth is so dry but lips aren't too bad with a bit of lip balm. Dry mouth spray works for a couple of minutes then back to furry dry mouth and throat. Ah and my scalp doesn't itch anymore.

This is the worst it will be. From today onwards it will only get easier and better and i just cant wait! X

Tuesday, 16th Oct '12:

 Hi fellow banders and banders-to-be, this will hopefully be my last post from Dolan Park and i shall continue to report from home afterwards

Last night i managed to pee properly for the fist time, yay and managed my first satisfactory burp also, yay again! Mini burps did obviously help but a big one felt soo good, i never thought i would be so grateful for a burp lol.

I felt a bit bloated before i went to bed last night because ive been drinking pretty much all afternoon and evening. I had several cups of water, a chicken soup and hot chocolate. I think i'll need to learn not to drink too fast.

They put some sort of wraps around my legs to improve blood flow and circulation When i wnt to bed and the wraps are connected to a machine that inflates and deflates left and right at a time - a bit like a blood pressure Monitor, only very gentle. I thought it would be awkward to sleep in those, it was fine.

I woke up just before 5am having slept great, had to call the nurse to get up as my legs were connected to the machine and went for a pee while she brought me a cup of tea. It was lovely, especially because i woke up with a sore throat.

Walked up and down the corridors a bit. My wind pain seems to have shifted from my back to my shoulder, still on the left side. Its much more bearable than yesterday though.

My incisions were red and hot yesterday, as expected. But today i found them much better to my surprise. I'll try to attach a photo. There are 3 small and 2 large ones. Small ones are barely visible. They are all glued.

I had a cup of tea, then half a cup of cappucino this morning. Im sipping my breakfast smoothie now, strawberry and banana and its lush! I was also given a muller light vanilla yogurt, i asked if it's not too thick for the liquid stage and the nurse said it's fine, slides down easily. Keeping that for later.

I've been given another Clexane injection this morning (had the first one yesterday after the op) and i will not need to self-inject anything when i go home.

Im not allowed to shower for 5 days but it's ok to wash the rest of the body, trying to keep the glued incisions dry.

Im feeling MUCH better than yesterday, just a bit of shoulder pain and bloated feeling and tenderness in the tummy and haven't had painkillers since 11pm last night.

Waiting for my husband to come and pick me up at 7 and we'll head home. Normally the journey is around 2.5-3 hours. Looks like we'll hit the rush hour traffic this morning so i'll take some more tramadol before the journey, it lasts around 4 hours. Then i can top it up with the liquid paracetamol they gave me with my discharge papers.

Overall, a fantastic experience so far. I was up all night the night before my surgery crying and scared but they staff are so lovely and helpful and they look after you so well. Im very impressed with Dolan Park and every single person i met who works here.

Thank you for your supportive messages, it means so much to know others are on the same boat as me.

Tobi x

Wednesday, 17th Oct '12:

Today im full of gas and have zero appetite but still happy :) one day at a time, one fart at a time hahaha x

Thursday, 18th Oct '12:

I had no difficulty drinking after the op but the next day struggled to keep the liquids up. Wind pain is more manageable today though, phew...

 ~ ~ ~ 

After a couple of days of zero appetite, I felt hungry tonight. I had some chicken stock and added a teaspoon of skimmed milk powder and a teaspoon of cheese sauce mix in it and turned into some sort of soup - it tastes amazing :)

I wonder how much I can manage though, just waiting for it to cool down a bit so I can have it.

What does restriction feel like? After I have a few sips of whatever I'm having I feel my chest tighten a bit as if I need a burp but I can't burp and I can't sip anymore. Am I forcing my band? Or is this just the soreness cos of the op? It's so foreign to me, I don't understand how it works yet. A little scary! X

(I got a response that I could be drinking either too quick or too much. It's been recommended take I take longer pauses between sips to allow the liquid drip through my new funnel)

... sipping slower is something I'm going to have to learn. But I think this is trapped wind as it shifts as I move... Bleh

X

~ ~ ~

It gets better everyday. To give you an idea this is what I've done today: My husband had to go back to work today so I am alone at home and I managed to get up, go down the stairs, empty the dishwasher, tidy up the living room on my own and I went for a walk for 30 min. I could have done these yesterday too but I didn't have to, so I didn't think about it.

Easy go get on with daily stuff but of course I can't compare my experience with yours looking after children as I don't have any. There are things I couldn't do on my own. I couldn't put my socks on for example. I had a bit of difficulty pulling my trousers up but managed it in the end. I can't lift the cats up yet, they are average size cats weighing around 5kg. Maybe it would be a good idea to get some help around the house with the children for the first week?

I could go to work today because I have a desk job but it would have been uncomfortable. I don't rely on the painkillers as much either. I took some in the morning when I woke up but didn't need to afterwards. Will probably take some before I go to bed though.

I feel very well, just a bit sore here and there. 3 small incisions are almost healed, the two bigger ones are sore but this is to be expected.

Hope this helps! xx

~ ~ ~ 

Every single person at Dolan Park is great, they look after you so well - I didn't want to leave! :)

I must be one of the worst cases they've seen - sobbing and shaking pretty much constantly before the op but even I was laughing by the time I was on the operating table. I promise you everyone does a great job to make you feel at ease and calm you down.

Good luck :) x

Friday, 19th Oct '12:

Hey! I'm much better thank you :) didn't need to take painkillers all day except the first one in the morning and I had a 30 min walk, yay! 3 small incisions are fine, the other two are still very sore but it is to be expected.

~ ~ ~ 

(As a reply to how much I could have) ... Not much hon, Half a coffee mug maybe? Takes me about an hour to finish xxx 


~ ~ ~


Things I learned today:

Don't be brave, take your painkillers. Even tho it's ok in the day, going to bed and getting comfortable will be an issue...

Make sure you always have a glass of water around you. You might feel the need to cough and coughing hurts!

Laughing also hurts! And i bet sneezing should too... Keeping your hand pressed lightly over port can make it a tad better.

Tough night so far, I gave up and decided to sleep on the sofa :(

(I got high on co codomol and went back to bed and slept for 6 hours in the end)

Sunday, 21st Oct '12:

How time flies, it's already the end of week 1!

I've remembered to take it easy after my painful night a couple of days ago and been feeling much better since. It's important to remember you had surgery :)

Like they tell you, it was not pain free. It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be either. But it really does get better every day. I couldn't lift up the cats a couple of days ago or pick something up from the floor but I can today. It's easier to get in and out of bed and I stopped sleeping in a semi sitting position a couple of nights ago, I sleep mostly on my back and I could even sleep on my right side for a couple of hours last night. Still can't sleep on my left side yet.

3 small incisions are healed very well. 2 bigger ones are still sore but not pulling/tugging as much. One of them is raised though, I have a feeling that will scar more than the other but I couldn't care less.

I am feeling hungry but still can't have more than half a mug of soup at a time and I find it frustrating that I can't have more. I'm sure this is head hunger and I'll need to learn to deal with this.

I didn't dare weigh myself this weekend. I still feel very bloated and I would be very disappointed if I didn't lose anything so I'll leave it til next saturday.

Bored being at home already but I still have another day off, going back to work on Tuesday. I'm slightly worried about driving, I hope it'll be fine.

Funny how big and life changing this operation was for me and although it's just been 1 week, I'm pretty much back to normal.

No regrets whatsoever... none at all :) xxx

Surgery Day - Part 2 - After the Surgery

First part of the surgery day can be found here. This post covers what happened after I woke up :)

It only felt like a second or two after i passed out when I heard someone talk to me. No idea what they said but I remember waking up, opening my eyes, seeing some woman's very blurry face looking at mine. I think I asked her if it went well and she said yes. I asked if they could put the band in and she said it was very successful and that she'll take me to my room now. I remember being pushed in my bed to my room but couldn't open my eyes. I heard people talk but I couldn't look at them. It was all fine and calm and peaceful.

I remember managing to open my eyes a little to see my husband and we talked, not sure what we said though. Then I thought I'll close my eyes for another second or two and then wake up... and I did. Although, apparently it was not a couple of seconds but a couple of hours :)

When I opened my eyes fully, I noticed the oxygen mask on my face, it didn't bother me but I didn't think it did much either so I got rid of it :P They also said oxygen levels in my blood was 100% so that was good. Blood pressure, again, was good and normal. The nurses kept visiting very often, checking oxygen levels, blood pressure etc. I had a Clexane injection to prevent blood clots.

While I was asleep my husband texted all our family and friends to let them know and they were ringing him back to check and everyone was very surprised to hear me on the phone so shortly after the op when he passed the phone to me :)

Slowly, I started to notice the pain in my abdomen and left of my back... it was getting sharper and sharper. I asked for painkillers but the nurse said I was already given some and that I should try to sleep a bit. Easy to ask... I think I managed to nap on and off for an hour or so until I was given some more painkillers, which really helped. At this point, I felt like I was ready to go back to sleep so I sent my husband out to get something to eat for himself.

I believe I've been asleep for an hour or so when a nurse came in and told me we'll need to change the bedding and my clothes etc. Ahhh, nice, hello clothes and byebye hospital gown. I held out my hand so she can help me get up but she said I needed to do it on my own. Great... I pushed myself on my armes but man it hurt so much! The pain took my breath away and I folded on to myself while trying to get up it was sooo painful. She helped me put my pyjamas on and changed the bed sheets - they were covered in iodine. I thought it was blood first and got scared but nope, all good :)

Also, they brought me to a semi-sitting position which was much better than lying down on my back. I sat there on the edge of the bed, dressed in my pyjamas all nice and clean and couldn't really move! My husband came back and found me all dressed up, I bet that made him happy although he was sad to miss my first getting up, I told him it's better that he didn't because it wasn't pretty...

I sipped some peppermint tea, then walked around a bit better after another go at painkillers. At this point 3 of us, all just banded, were walking up and down the corridor :))

One of the other ladies said she was so hungry and they gave her chicken soup and it made her feel much better. At that second I felt such relief because I was feeling hungry too! I was just to embarrassed to tell anyone because I thought I wasn't supposed to have an appetite after the surgery! I also had some soup and I think at that moment, that cup of chicken soup was the best food I've ever tasted in my life :)

Mr Super came to see me at some point, I can't remember when exactly. He told me the op went really well, my liver shrunk good and the rest of my organs looked very healthy and they weren't fatty at all. I was really pleased to hear that because I thought the worst of myself as always.

He said a small size band (10ml) fitted just fine and he even put a 1ml fill in it, yay!

After a while I felt my legs were getting swollen and the anti-embolism stockings got very painful They started to roll down and that really hurt. We took them off and the nurse said it's ok because I was mobile and they would put blood circulation boots on for the night when I go to bed which will be connected to a machine. It was a bit like blood pressure monitor but not painful at all.

I was told I'm supposed to pee tonight and I had a go. Sat there for 20 minutes but managed it in the end.

I went to bed around 11pm (husband had to leave around 10ish) with the wraps around my calves. I thought it would be awkward to sleep like that but it didn't feel weird at all, I slept just fine after Skype'in a couple of friends.

What a day... Felt like it was longer than 24 hours at times and also felt like it did fly past.

This is the day I was reborn :) even my husband calls me Wife 2.0! X

Surgery Day - Part 1 - Before the Surgery

Firstly, I'm on the 2nd day post-op and doing very well :) Everything goes so quickly and so slowly at the same time, it's difficult to keep record of what's going on on a regular basis like I used to do and blog pre-operatively. But before I forget all the details, I'd like to write about my surgery day...

Let's start with the night before the surgery actually. To put it simply, it was hell... The fear kicked in and the logical side of me and the paranoid side of me gave a big fight, the paranoid side won over the emotions so I was awake all night, tearful and fearful, desperately trying to sleep in an unfamiliar hotel room and getting frustrated as I got more and more tired. I really wanted my husband to sleep properly the night before because he'd be rushing around the next day but with me tossing and turning and sobbing every now and then, he was awake pretty much all night also.

 

15 October 2012, Monday... We were asked to be at the hospital at 7am so by the time it was 5:30, we got up and started to get ready. We left the hotel and arrived at the hospital, it was still dark. Inside, there were already several people sitting at the reception and looked like at least 4 of us were there for bariatric surgery

A male doctor were calling everyone from a list for the blood tests and the ECG. I think 2 people went before me and came back quickly and resumed their wait before being taken to their rooms. When I went in, I was already shaking with fear and I knew it will be a problem finding my veins. Arms didn't work so he tried the hands. After poking about a bit, one hand didn't work, so he tried the other hand. After 10 minutes of trying (very gently, I have to add) he managed to do it on my right hand. I was about to pass out several times but he calmed me down - really appreciated his attitude, he looked after me so well and was kind, understanding and gentle. ECG was a much better experience, didn't feel a thing and my heart was absolutely fine despite beating like mad due to anxiety :)

First battle won, I was now calmer and no longer frightened, just excited. I rang my mum, told her how we're doing and we had a little chat, both trying to sound cheerful. I went back in and shortly after a nurse took us to my room. Very roomy, lovely room, not scary like other hospital rooms I've seen before. It had a bathroom and a big wardrobe with safe, tv and a comfy chair for my husband to spend his next couple of days on.

What I liked most about the room was the view outside the window: grass, green and sheep :) After the op, I remember waking up to the baa-ing sheep and chirping birds, then falling back to sleep smiling...

Two nurses came to check us in the room, they went over my medical history again, one of them measured my calf and length of my leg and brought the correct size anti-embolism stockings to put on. And he also showed me the hospital gown and paper knickers I was supposed to wear. I immediately objected and said I have 100% cotton pants and to my relief yes it was ok to wear those instead. I don't think the paper one was big enough for a single leg of mine!

I then took a shower, dried my hair (good thing I brought a hair dryer because i haven't seen one in the room!) and tried wearing the gown. It was a bit on the small side, the back didn't quite meet but the problem was with the strings, I think one was a bit too short to tie properly so I asked for another one. They brought me one a few sizes too big for me but I loved it, it was very comfy and the back of it covered my bottom and the back of my legs although I still wore my own dressing gown on top.

Anti-embolism stockings are a pain to wear though, very very tight!

Then my Superman surgeon Mr Super came to see me. He was very sweet, smiled the whole time. He told me he was very impressed with my weight loss before the surgery and that I lost more than he asked me and it showed dedication which results in better post-op success. Then he went over the risks etc again and I signed the consent forms.

Shortly after, the anaesthetist came to see me. She was so friendly and I cannot even begin to describe how lovely she was and how much she calmed me down. I told her I was terrified of needles and that we already had an episode in the blood tests and that I was VERY scared and she promised to look after me :) She looked at my hands and arms and said she reckons she could use the top of the left hand, which was a relief because the other alternative was using the inside of the left arm and that would be an awkward position and probably very painful as the skin is so delicate there. She said the nurses will put numbing Emla cream on the hands and the inside of my arm so by the time I'm in the operating room they should be numb enough. Really appreciated her attitude here, cannot explain how much this helped me.

The nurse said I was 3rd to go and she came back when the 2nd patient went in the surgery to put Emla on my hands. It started tickling immediately so it looked promising. They put a big blob of it on the hand and cover with plaster so it's concentrated for the area.

I removed my contact lenses and wore my glasses instead. Removed my wedding band and engagement ring and gave them to my husband. I was now ready for my op and was waiting for a nurse to take me to the operating theatre. Tears came running back and I held on to my husband. I was very scared again but not sure what I was scared of at this point. My husband told me if I wanted to change my mind it was absolutely fine and we could just go home immediately. Hearing this meant a lot to me and I knew he meant it but I also knew what I wanted and I didn't want to live like this anymore and I wanted this band fitted in me no matter how scared I am of needles or general anesthetics...

The nurse came around 10:30am and the three of us walked to the lift where I said goodbye to my husband and cried a bit more. When in the lift with the nurse, she calmed me down and told me however you go under, you wake up pretty much in the same state so I tried to control myself. We started walking in the theatre, I saw Superman and he smiled at me, then I saw the anaesthetist lady and another guy (her assistant maybe?) and they were as sweet as always. I stopped crying, wiped my eyes and answered their questions - going over my medical history once again, probably this was the 5th time this morning so far. He asked me what operation I was going to have and that made me laugh and I said to him hopefully he knew which op it was at this point! Obviously he knew and he was checking with me but I found that funny.

The nurse took my dressing gown and slippers and took them back to my room and I walked in with the anesthetics team. There were other people in the room and they all seemed friendly and they said hi. I think they were preparing the tools to poke me with. I laid on the bed, a black leather bed with foot rest at the end of it and arm rests on the sides and a large square pad in the middle, it looked like a giant sanitary towel, probably in case you pee or something?

They were both so lovely and took my mind off things by general chit chat. I asked them to tell me what exactly they are doing because it's more scary for me if I didn't know what was going on. I was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling with big surgical lights and feeling very vulnerable yet comfortable and I trusted them fully.

Firstly they worked on my hand for what seemed like a long time to put the cannula in. They made me move my hand from the wrist and she told me not to worry because she wants to get this right and find the vein in this hand rather than trying the inside of my arm. It did work in the end and it was completely painless. I did feel the needle go in but that's about it really. The guy put a mask over my face, why did I think it would be black I don't know but I was pleasantly surprised that it was clear plastic. I also assumed it would smell funny whatever gas it was but no it was odourless. They were talking to me all the time explaining what they did and that really helped. He asked me to take very deep breaths while she said she will give the meds in now and I should expect to feel it moving to my arm from my hand, it could be a warm feeling or maybe a little sharper and that it will go up my arm, then my shoulders and my cheeks and chest will feel warm while it moves to the other shoulders. I did indeed feel it move from my arm up my shoulder, my cheeks or chest didn't really feel hot but as it moved to my other shoulder everything started to blur up and I might have said "here we go" and I passed out...

I remember feeling grateful for falling asleep at that point and I really wasn't scared anymore as I fully trusted the the anesthetics team and my surgeon Dr Super. His name does help though, doesn't it? :)

Continued in Part 2 of the Surgery Day post! xxx

Pre-Op Diet - Day 21 - Day before surgery

I can't believe how time flies. It's the last day of my pre-op diet and tomorrow morning I'll be at Dolan Park hospital and finally get banded!

I'm rather nervous at the moment but I think it's mostly because of what I don't know. I'm prepared for what I know but there are so many things I'm unsure of.

Will they find my veins alright? It's always been a pain (literally) to get blood tests done for me. Will my hand/arm bruise badly as it always does? Will my legs fit in the anti embolism stockings? Will my pre op blood tests etc be good for me to have the op? Will I gain weight overnight and go over 50 BMI? Did my liver shrink enough? How much will it hurt after the op? Will my husband, rest of the family and close friends be sick with worry during surgery? Will I see my cats again? Will I live?

It was a beautiful day, sunny and warm - bloody freezing now though. We had a lazy morning and although I was awake from 5am, we had a lie in and cuddled up with the cats. Around mid day we took them to the cattery and came back home to finish tidying up. I took a long shower while my husband watched the grand prix.

We left the house around 5pm and drove to Bromsgrove and checked in the hotel we booked, very close to Dolan Park hospital. Left our luggage in the room and went out to find the hospital. It's very close but you drive through narrow country lanes.

It's a very nice building with a fountain outside and a little lake in it's grounds. We went in and had a quick look around and that's when the fear kicked in...

We came back to the hotel, I was shivering but apparently it's not that cold, it must be the nerves. I sent my husband out to grab dinner and I talked to my mum. I could hear she was tearful while trying to calm me down and I could hear her fear when she was telling me not to be scared. Not her fault of course, she's trying very hard to keep her cool but she wants to be here. I want her to be here with me too but I want her to be with my dad more than I want her for myself. Better for the both of them.

By the time I finish typing this I expects husband to be back and we'll watch a film or something to busy ourselves. Hopefully I can sleep tonight...

It may be the day before my surgery and the last day of the pre-op diet but I'm still on the pre-op diet so I've been good:

09:00 am - Muller light cherry yogurt
10:00 am - Decaf coffee made with 275ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:45 am - Muller light cherry yogurt
12:15 pm - Decaf coffee made with 250ml unsweetened soya milk
14:15 pm - Slim Fast ready-made raspberry
16:00 pm - 400ml water
18:00 pm - Starbucks venti soya latte (600ml)

Total calories: 804kcal
Total liquids: 1925ml
Total milk: 1525ml (~2.6 pints)
Total yogurts: 2

I'll try to get some more liquid in me tonight. Still have the oxo cube with me but I don't really fancy it. I might have a green tea or black decaf coffee. I really miss black coffee.

Hopefully next time I post here I will have my band :)

I am scared of this and that but I know that in the long run it will be so worth it. I know this was the right thing to do for me. I was dreading the pre-op milk diet and yes it was hard work but I've done it. I am now dreading the post op pain and I know it will be a tough couple of days but I also know that I can do it. I will do it :) xxx

What I packed in my hospital bag

Last night I packed my hospital bag and I was excited as if I'm packing for a holiday!

I have a feeling I'm taking too much stuff with me. Whenever I have the same feeling while packing for holidays, I don't even touch most of the stuff I take with me and probably this will be the same. But what if I need either one of these things? Better be safe than sorry and I won't be carrying my bag myself anyway ;)

All of these below (except stuff in my hand bag of course) fit in a hand luggage so I'm not taking a full size suitcase or anything!

(Edited to mark what I actually used and some more comments in blue)

Toiletries:
Shampoo, shower gel and sponge (used what I took with my but they provided these in the room anyway)
Hair brush and hair clip/band (used)
Hair dryer (what if they don't have one? I have long hair and don't want to go to surgery with dripping wet hair) (used and glad i took it!)
Deodorant (used on 2nd day and on the way home)
Toothbrush & toothpaste (used)
Dry mouth spray (will try to remember to put this and the lip balm by the bedside) (used a lot!)
Vaseline Aloe Vera lip balm (also have E45 depending on the severity of cracked lips) (used the E45, lips were pretty dry)
Ear plugs (not sure I'll need them but it was recommended before so can't hurt) (did not need as in private room)
Wet wipes (used the 2nd morning to freshen up)
Wet toilet tissue (didn't need)
Tampons (just in case) (didn't need)
Contact lens case & solution (apparently you need to take your contacts out before the op) (used)
Glasses & case (don't think I can put contacts on just after the op but I'd hate to see things blurry - glasses will have to do until I can get up and find a mirror) (used)

Clothes:
Pyjamas (very loose waist for the bottom and short sleeved top) (used and loved it)
Nightie (not sure pyjamas or this will be more comfortable so taking both) (didn't use or like it)
Dressing gown (I am taking a long thin and jersey one to cover my bum while wearing the hospital gown) (used it all the time)
100% cotton pants (x3) and socks (x2) (pants: used one in the op and it's gone in the bin as covered in iodine, changed into second pair after op, then used the third on the 2nd day. socks: only used in second day as I wore anti embolism stockings on the op day)
Soft bra (used it on both days)
Slippers (used it all the time)
Towel (I read hospital towels are tiny, taking my own) (used mine for my body and the hospital one for my hair)
Loose top & trousers to go home in (used)

Other stuff:
Hot water bottle (wasn't allowed to use it as it might cause bleeding, it was ok to use it on my back the next day)
Box of tissues (didn't need, they already provided one)
iPad & charger (husband is taking his laptop too so we have enough entertainment :P) (used it all the time)
Headphones (used it)

Also have these in my handbag:
Purse (did not use or need money)
iPhone (used it all the time)
Hand cream (I get eczema on my fingers when I'm stressed) (didn't need)
Anti bacterial hand gel (used it before i touched my incisions)
First Defense (used it the night before the op as didn't want to risk a cold)
Sunglasses (again, just in case for the journey, eyes too sensitive) (used it on the way to the hospital, it was a sunny day)
A little jewelry box (for my husband to keep my wedding rings in while I'm in surgery, he'd lose them if it's not in a box :P) (used it)
All paperwork and correspondence from provider (just in case) (used it to take a couple of notes on, didn't need to carry with me)
Medicine:
(I've been told that meds will be provided at the hospital and some more to take home but in the documents it says bring all meds with you. Obviously it may mean the meds you're already on rather than those you will be on but it'll be good to check with the nurse what I'm intending to use afterwards anyway.) (did not need painkillers while in the hospital, it was provided)
Soluble paracetamol (they give you one on discharge, no need)
Liquid ibuprofen (not allowed to use for 2 weeks)
Soluble co-codomol (good to buy to use at home)
Bassetts soft & chewy multivitamin and mineral pastilles (taken one on second day)
Windeze, Deflatine and Boots own brand wind relief tablets (lol I know it's overkill but wind pain is what I'm dreading the most and what if one works better than the other?) (been advised Windeze is better and also told to only suck and spit out when about to finish so i dont have to chew it. Later at home i tried all and I find Boots own brand to work better. Yes, I did use them while at the hospital too.)
Peppermint tea (I have to confess I absolutely hate peppermint tea but I'm sure I'll hate wind pain more) (didn't need, they had it at the hospital)
Arnica cream and tablets (to help with bruising - I don't expect to need or use it at the hospital but taking them to check with the nurse) (not the tablets but arnica cream worked wonders on my badly bruised hand after the blood test)

For the car:
Soft blanket and 2 soft pillows for the journey back home (used one pillow on my back, blanket on my knees and legs, other pillow under the seat belt)

Pre-Op Diet - Day 20

I can't believe it's Saturday already... It's almost Monday! Eeek! I think I'm a mixture of excited, scared, nervous and happy...

It was a hectic day, preparing for next week. Lots of cleaning, tidying up, turning the spare bedroom into a room for me to sleep on my own for the first few days with about 6-7 pillows, mattress raised with another thin one underneath so that I can get in and out of bed easily (ours is quite low, hence the spare bed while I can't use my abdominal muscles) etc etc. I put everything together to go in my hospital bag and typing this while I have my Oxo cube. I'll go pack stuff afterwards and make another post with what I packed.

I received lots of phone calls, texts, emails today from my lovely friends and family. My in-laws came around to wish me good luck and they will come and stay with me on Thursday and Friday when my husband has to go back to work.

Tomorrow we'll drop the cats in the cattery and drive up to Birmingham, stay the night in a hotel in Bromsgrove and go to the hospital 7am Monday morning. My husband will stay for two nights there while I spend Monday night in the hospital.

I completely forgot to write about it yesterday - I got the phone call from the hospital to advise me what time to arrive. They didn't tell me what time my op will be though. We'll learn when we get there I suppose. Hopefully it won't be too late in the day, I just want it over and done with so I don't get too scared or nervous.

I'm not allowed to eat after midnight the day before and I can't have water after 5am on the day. As if I ate anything, pffft :)


Right, I'll go pack my hospital bag now and will post what I packed later on.

Here's what I ate/drank today:

10:00 am - Weightwatchers greek style peach yogurt
10:30 am - Decaf coffee made with 300ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:20 am - Decaf coffee made with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed
13:15 pm - 300ml unsweetened soya milk
14:00 pm - Weightwatchers greek style peach yogurt
14:45 pm - Decaf coffee made with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed
15:30 pm - 400ml no added sugar squash
17:15 pm - Slim Fast raspberry ready-made
18:30 pm - Decaf coffee made with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed
19:30 pm - Total 0% greek yogurt
20:30 pm - Oxo beef cube with 250ml hot water

Total calories: 798kcal
Total milk: 1225ml
Total liquids: 2475ml
Yogurts: 3

Pre-Op Diet - Day 19

Three more sleeps and it's surgery day, I can't wait! It was my last day at work and I'll be on leave for 10 days. Obviously it was busy as always but helps time fly.

My walk to the office and back was very pleasant today, I feel like I'm getting quicker and I get much less tired. The trousers I've been wearing to work feel a bit looser and my husband swears my bum got smaller :)

After work, I went to Sainsbury's to get some supplies for next week. I got chicken and mushroom cup-a-soups, Heinz tomato, chicken and mushroom tins too. I bought a few ready-made bottles of Slim Fast raspberry, my favorite flavour. Now because this is made with normal milk, I may not have it in the end but I thought it's good to have a couple just in case. I got some Actimel and more oat milk. I was planning to get some ice lollies but I completely forgot...

Then I remembered I really don't like tinned soup or cup-a-soup so I decided to make my own. Bought some supplies and spent the evening cooking. I really missed cooking! Cooking and especially baking is my 'thing'... or was :)

First I boiled 8 drumsticks (without the skin) in 2 litres of water to make chicken stock. Once cooked, I sieved the bits out (perfectly good chicken pieces for husband to have later). Then I boiled a few green beans, a courgette, a baby parsnip and a baby leek in half of the stock. When the vegs got really soft, I sieved the juices and kept the veg for my husband. I'll freeze the other half of the stock.

And I made another, just for variety, this time with beef, potato and carrot. I rolled the mince into little meatballs and boiled them with the veg. Once it was cooked, I again sieved all the meatballs and veg out.

I put my soup in little containers and will chill them (plus the other half of the stock) overnight, chuck the top fat layer in the morning and freeze. Hopefully I will have a bit of appetite to have these next week.

Today I rushed around too much to care or fancy any food and had the following:

08:15 am - Decaf coffee made with 300ml lactofree semi skimmed
09:15 am - 400ml water
10:15 am - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:30 am - 250ml lactofree semi skimmed + 1 sachet of Slim Fast
12:45 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
14:30 pm - 350ml oat milk
15:30 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
17:00 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
18:00 pm - Weightwatchers raspberry yogurt
20:00 pm - Total 0% yogurt
20:30 pm - Oxo beef cube

Total calories: 774kcal
Total liquids: 2800ml
Total milk: 1200ml (2 pints)
Total yogurt: 2

So much to do tomorrow, starting with the hospital bag packing :) x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 18

This morning I received a phone call from a nurse from The Hospital Group to go through my medical history and to check if I had any special needs. Thankfully, physically I don't have any special needs but I did mention my trapped nerve in the leg and the lactose problem I've been having. She was lovely and very friendly. I also asked about echinacea, that I started taking it but stopped after a few tablets as I've read it shouldn't be taken before surgery. She said don't take any more (I wasn't anyway) and that it's ok to use First Defence. Also it's only a problem when you have a chest infection, they don't cancel surgery because of a common cold. That was a relief to hear.

I was very busy today so I didn't notice I had too few calories... I didn't have any Slim Fast either, that's probably why. But I did have oat milk for lunch and that filled me up.

I've been running around in the house washing and tidying the last couple of days. We won't be able to do any washing for at least a week after my operation so I'm making sure all our clothes and bedding are washed, dried and put away in wardrobes and cupboards. I think I've done 3 loads of washing after I came home today and one in the morning. We had friends staying over so it's extra sets of bedding and towels etc that's been lying around since previous weekend, oops.

Then I had to go and pick my husband up from the airport so I didn't have a second to stop and think of anything this evening.

Absolutely knackered now, it's time to bed... But first, the food:


08:15 am - Decaf coffee made with 300ml lactofree semi skimmed
10:15 am - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:00 am - 400ml water
12:00 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
13:30 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
14:30 pm - 400ml oat milk
15:00 pm - Cup of tea with a drop of milk
16:00 pm - Muller light cherry yogurt
17:15 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
18:30 pm - 350ml unsweetened soya milk
19:30 pm - Total 0% greek yogurt
20:00 pm - Oxo beef cube in 350ml hot water
22:00 pm - Muller light strawberry yogurt

Total calories: 748kcal
Total liquids: 3000
Total milk: 1350
Total yogurt: 3

Night night x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 17

Today I did a bit of research and found out that echinacea shouldn't be taken before surgery... Should have read it before I started taking it, pffft. At least I've only taken like 3 tiny tablets and stopped immediately!

Walked to work and back, busy day in the office, hardly managed the milk I took to work to make coffee with and had to have a ready made Slim Fast for lunch because I just couldn't be bothered to do anything else... As expected, it didn't stay for long in my body but oh well... I'm so fed up.

5 days to go and I cannot wait!

One good thing is, I discovered Total 0% fat greek yogurt for dinner, it's soooo nice, something savory for a change!

08:00 am - Decaf coffee made with 250ml lactofree semi skimmed
09:30 am - 400ml water
10:30 am - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:30 am - 400ml water
12:15 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
13:00 pm - 400ml water
14:00 pm - Slim Fast raspberry
14:30 pm - 250ml water
15:00 pm - Muller light cranberry & raspberry
15:45 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
17:00 pm - Decaf coffee made with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
18:45 pm - Total 0% yogurt
19:15 pm - Oxo beef cube in 300ml hot water
20:15 pm - 250ml oatly organic oat milk
21:00 pm - Mulle light banana yogurt

Total calories: 839kcal
Total liquids: 3575ml
Total milk: 1125ml (~1.9 pints)
Total yogurts: 3

Pre-Op Diet - Day 16

I worked from home today so no walking for me but I went up and down the stairs like a lunatic for exercise, haha. I'm sure it counts :)

Then I spent my lunch hour at my osteopath. Hopefully my leg pain should improve in a couple of days. My muscle is so stiff, it's pressing on the nerve, hence the pain. She stuck some acupuncture needles in trying to loosen up the muscle. It bloody hurt but hopefully it'll be worth it.

Other than that nothing much to note really, boring milk and yogurt as usual. Not hungry at all, just boooored...

08:00 am - Decaf coffee made with 300ml lactofree semi skimmed
11:15 am - Muller light mandarin yogurt
11:30 am - Decaf coffee made with 250ml lactofree semi skimmed
14:40 pm - Slim Fast powder & 250ml lactofree semi skimmed
15:00 pm - 400ml water
16:15 pm - Muller light strawberry yogurt
16:45 pm - 400ml water
18:30 pm - 350ml unsweetened soya milk
19:30 pm - Total 0% yogurt
20:00 pm - Oxo beef cube in 350ml hot water
21:00 pm - Decaf coffee made with 150ml lactofree semi skimmed

Total milk: 1300ml (~2.2 pints)
Total liquids: 2750ml
Total yogurts: 3
Total calories: 914kcal

I upped my calories to 900ish from 600ish in the last two days and hopefully it will get me out of this starvation mode and lose some more weight before my op... 5 days to go!

Now I'm enjoying Mamma Mia on telly, good night! :) x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 15

I have managed to get more calories in today. Hopefully I'll get out of this starvation mode and lose a bit more weight this week.

I am suddenly paranoid about getting a cold. So many people at work have colds and being in an open office, it's a bit inevitable. I'd be gutted if I got a cold a week before my surgery! So I've been using First Defense and antibacterial hand gel all day. Also started taking echinacea tablets. Making my husband do the same, who knows which one of us might bring the virus in the house. I've worked so hard on this pre-op diet, I would be devastated if my op had to be postponed because of a stupid cold!

I gave Slim Fast another go this morning. Let me put it this way, it went in at 9:30 and came out at 11... Ok it lost its last chance, no more Slim Fast ready made.

I think I'm pretty much done with my hospital bag. I have got everything except the calcium. I'll double check with someone if it's ok to take the ones with Vitamin D as I can't seem to find pure calcium tablets. Followed my mother-in-law's advice and I bought Arnica cream (Boot's own brand, it doesn't smell bad, it doesn't smell at all) and Arnica tablets. The tablets are weird! They come in a glass vial in a plastic container and you're not supposed to touch them. They are so tiny, like mini pearls, they might dissolve in your hand so to get the best benefit, you just dissolve it under your tongue. Hope it works! Apparently it's good to build up before the op, that's why I started taking them now. Because they melt in the mouth, I will be able to continue to take them after the op too.

The nerve pain in my leg is getting worse by the day so I got an appointment from my osteopath for tomorrow. I'm just worried that after the op I might have to sit or lie down for long periods of time and it will be so much more painful then with the leg all stiff.

Food as follows:

08:00 am - Decaf coffee made with 250ml lactofree semi skimmed
09:30 am - Slim Fast ready-made raspberry
10:00 am - Decaf coffee with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
10:30 am - 250ml water
11:30 am - Decaf coffee with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
12:45 pm - Decaf coffee with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
14:00 pm - 250ml water
15:00 pm - 400ml soya milk
17:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 75ml lactofree semi skimmed
18:30 pm - Decaf coffee with 200ml lactofree semi skimmed
19:00 pm - Total 0% yogurt
19:30 pm - Oxo beef cube in 350ml hot water
20:30 pm - Muller light cherry yogurt

Total liquids: 3375ml
Total milk: 1475ml (~2.5 pints)
Total yogurts: 2

I'm fed up with the milk and yogurts. Roll on 15th of October! x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 14

I found out in the last couple of weeks that occupying yourself makes this pre-op diet easier. Weekdays are much easier at work and weekends are hard work if you're at home lazing around. So we went out today to look at some new furniture and curtains we don't even need :) Then we popped around to my in-laws for a cup of coffee and catch up.

My mother-in-law had an accident recently and she recommended Arnica cream for after my surgery. It was recommended to her too and although she didn't think it would work, she thought it wouldn't hurt to give it a go. She reckons it made visible improvement on her swelling and bruising in a very short time. Apparently there are melt-in-mouth tablets too to work its magic on the inside too - perfect for post-op. I need to get my hands on those this week! I researched a bit and it's recommended to start taking tablets before the op and that's what I've decided to do.

I've been looking for chewable multivitamins for some time now. No luck in Boots or Holland & Barrett. They have it for children but not adults. After a bit of reading around, I found Bassett's Soft & Chewy Active Health Multivitamins - Raspberry Flavour on Amazon and my ordered arrived yesterday. It's for young adults, lol! If I like it, I might put it on Amazon subscription so it's delivered monthly like I do with cat food :)

I need to get chewable calcium supplement too but I haven't seen one with just calcium so far, they all have added Vitamin D. I don't want to take excess Vitamin D, daily recommended dose is already in the multivitamins I take.

I have completed two weeks of the pre-op diet, 1 week to go. I have a feeling the last week will be the most difficult one as I'm fed up with milk already. I've come so far though, I will finish it. Focus on the future and it's bearable.

My only problem with the diet in the last couple of weeks is the amount of calories I consume. I've cut Slim Fast and oat milk due to the high sugar content but now I can't manage 800 calories a day without the shakes. I don't want to have the ready-made ones anymore because the lactose in normal milk upsets my tummy and the powder is disgusting. I'll go back to oat milk I think.

I don't really have a lot of time left to experiment but all I know is my weight loss slowed down considerably, I'm afraid my body has gone into starvation mode :( I lost around 2 pounds in the last week and considering what I'm having (or not having rather!) it's a very small loss.

Overall, I'm not panicking about losing enough weight anymore. I think I'm there already. See, the problem was my height. They measured my height as 165cm (5ft 5) but in fact I am 168cm tall which is between 5ft 6 and 5ft 7. Me being the paranoid me, I got my height measured when I went to my GP to get my blood pressure checked and it was 168cm. My BMI is 50.6 today if I am 5ft 5 according to the ticker factory (top right of the page) and WLSurgery forum profile. But on NHS website, it's 49.4... Confusing.. I have another week and I won't worry!

Ok, food:

07:15 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
09:00 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
10:00 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
10:45 am - Weighwatchers Greek style peach yogurt
13:00 pm - 400ml unsweetened soya milk
14:00 pm - 400ml water
15:30 pm - Cup of tea
16:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 150ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
16:30 pm - Weighwatchers Greek style peach yogurt
18:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 150ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
19:15 pm - Oxo cube with 370ml hot water
21:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 250ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
22:00 pm - Muller light banana yogurt

Total liquids: 2940
Total milk: 1250 (~2.2 pints)
Total yogurts:3

I'm so fed up with this pre-op diet, I am now looking forward to the op! x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 13

Feeling week and tired tonight. It might be because I only had 550 kcal all day and then topped it up to 650 with an additional yogurt just now. I skipped the Slim Fast altogether today and the calories didn't add up to anything near 800.

A good day overall, we visited friends and having good company does help the time fly - it's even better when there is no food around! I took a couple of bottles of soya milk with me and sipped that and had a pot of yogurt.

We took a walk, not for long really, maybe an hour but at a very leisurely pace. I'm absolutely shattered at the moment. Maybe I needed those high carbs in the shake? It's not just the high carb content... The ready-made bottles taste lovely but they are made with skimmed milk (no more lactose for me, thank you very much) and the powder when mixed into milk tastes vile... Arghhh, what to do, what to do?

Anyway, I'll reconsider tomorrow. I just need to crash now :)

Oh, and my husband had to go out to the pub to have dinner tonight and I felt really bad. He can't even have a decent meal in his own house because of me :(

Today I had:

10:30 am - Decaf coffee made with 250ml lactofree semi skimmed milk
11:00 am - Weightwatchers cherry yogurt
12:15 pm - 130ml oat milk
13:00 pm - 400ml water
14:00 pm - 400ml unsweetened soya milk
15:00 pm - 400ml water
16:00 pm - Decaf coffee made with 250ml unsweetened soya milk
17:00 pm - Weighwatchers Greek style summerfruit yogurt
19:30 pm - 375ml unsweetened soya milk
20:30 pm - 400ml water
21:00 pm - Oxo cube in hot water
22:00 pm - Muller light banana yogurt

Total milk: 1405ml (~2.4 pints)
Total liquids: 2905ml
Total yogurts: 3

Pre-Op Diet - Day 12

Funny how I used to get out of the house in the mornings and rush to work before. I would drag myself out with minutes to spare after I drive the whole 5 minutes to work and run from the car park. And if I have a minute to take some lunch with me, it would be stuffing a large tupperware box with leftovers from previous night's rich meal.

Most days I grabbed lunch from a local M&S. It would be a healthy salad and healthy crisps and some healthy nuts and a healthy smoothie/juice and a healthy fruit. All healthy choices but combined, the calories added up. I always bought bags of mixed nuts thinking I'll have some every day and it should last me a week - yeah right, I would be considered doing well if it lasted me 2 days. Nuts are healthy and good for you indeed, in much smaller amounts though...

This morning I thought about my past lunches while I carefully measured and packed today's milk allowance and took this photo :) 

A bottle of 300ml oat milk (nope, I couldn't give this up), another bottle of 400ml unsweetened soya milk and a pot of weightwatchers strawberry yogurt. I also prepared another bottle of 300ml lacto-free semi skimmed to make coffee with. And I walked to work carrying this extra weight with me under heavy rain with my ironic choice of audio book on my iPhone: The Hunger Games :)


My attempt at skipping the Slim Fast didn't go so well. The whole day I was fine but by the evening the hunger hit me, I became light headed and could barely move. I needed that sugar after all! So I had my shake for dinner, followed by my Oxo beef cube in hot water. I was so hungry, I put double the amount of hot water than I normally would to make it last longer, how pathetic is that! And I had a yogurt straight after that and then I was finally satisfied...

08:00 am - 50ml oat drink to take the vitamins tablet with
09:30 am - Decaf coffee with 75ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
11:00 am - 500ml water
11:30 am - Decaf coffee with 75ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
12:00 pm - 250ml water
13:00 pm - 300ml oat milk
14:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 75ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
15:00 pm - 250ml water
16:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 75ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
16:30 pm - Weightwatchers strawberry yogurt
17:30 pm - 400ml unsweetened soya milk
19:15 pm - 250ml lactofree and a sachet of Slim Fast
19:30 pm - Oxo beef cube in hot water
20:00 pm - Muller light banana yogurt

Total milk: 1300ml (~2.3 pints)
Total liquids: 3150ml
Yogurts: 2


I am proud of the 18 pounds I lost in less than 3 weeks and pleasantly surprised that I could carry on this long. But as I was telling my mum the other day, I don't think I could carry on like this if I was doing it to lose all my excess weight. It's only bearable because I have a certain amount of days to count down til the surgery...

Tomorrow is the first weekend I won't have any solid food and the first two days my husband will be around and he'll need to eat. We'll go visit friends after lunch time and will leave before dinner time and they know about my upcoming surgery and the pre-op diet so they won't keep any food around, just tea and coffee.

Will I feel normal again when I'm with other people?

Pre-Op Diet - Day 11

Finally I've done 3.5 litres of liquid today, actually a bit more than that! I bought myself a lovely Sistema sport bottle and it's so easy to sip when it's in front of you all day, all pink and cute :)

I also bought a Sistema shaker and used it to make Slim Fast strawberry for lunch. Shaker worked great but the Slim Fast tasted vile! I do like the ready made ones but can't stand the powder, blergh... It's got lots of sugar in it anyway and I was planning to drop it after finishing a couple of bottles I have left. Then I decided to try one of the sachets, it's just gross I'm afraid. How come the same product can taste so differently?!

In the last week, I started to shower in the evening just before bed time rather than in the morning. It feels a bit odd but certainly works for me. My reasons are: 1. Rather than a rushed shower in the morning, I can spend more time and enjoy it in the evening. 2. I walk to work and back so it's rather nice to wash the dirt of the day at the end of the day. 3. I've started a moisturising routine after shower (desperate attempts at minimising excess skin during weight loss) and again, I don't have time to do that in the mornings. The area is large, see, it takes a while :)

I've researched this a bit and 1. you have to exercise 2. you have to moisturise daily 3. you have to drink lots of water and 4. you have to accept the fact that you WILL have some excess skin and although the first 3 points do help, it's all down to for how long you've had the weight and how elastic your skin is. Sadly as the age goes up, the elasticity goes down. I'm prepared to have excess skin (I could take that any day over excess fat!) but I'm also stop being lazy and do as much as I can to minimise it.

Foodwise, it was yet another boring milk and yogurt day. But at least no diarrhea today thanks to milk alternatives and lacto-free milk:

08:00 am - Soya latte made with 350ml unsweetened soya milk
10:15 am - Decaf coffee with 150ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
11:00 am - 400ml water
12:15 pm - 400ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk + 1 sachet Slim Fast strawberry
13:00 pm - 400ml water
14:00 pm - 400ml water
15:00 pm - 200ml oat milk
16:00 pm - Muller light cherry yogurt
17:30 pm - Decaf coffee with 250ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
18:00 pm - 400ml water
18:30 pm - Muller light banana yogurt
19:00 pm - 400ml water
20:00 pm - Oxo cube in hot water

Total liquids: 3.8 litres (YESSS!!!)
Total milk: 1350ml (~2.3 pints)
Total yogurts: 2 pots

Pleased with my water intake today but I couldn't resist the urge and did have some oat milk in the end although yesterday I said I wouldn't because there's a lot of sugar in it. Well, I have already opened the bottle and might as well have a little every day - it's so yummy!

Can't wait til this is over now. I alternate moods quite often but today I'm actually looking forward the surgery and my new life :) x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 10

I can't believe it's been 10 days, that means 12 sleeps until the surgery! Pre-op diet is hard work, I won't lie but focusing on the future makes it bearable. It does get easier but as days go by, I keep myself fancying various food - I'm not really hungry, I'm just fed up with milk!

Since I stopped having normal milk, I've been trying soya and oat milks. Soya milk is lush when hot as a soya latte and oat milk is yummy cold on its own. However, today I looked at its nutritional value and noticed how high the sugar is. Well it had to be didn't it, wouldn't have tasted so good otherwise... I'll try not to have any more oat milk and have more soya and lacto-free semi skimmed. I'm also cutting down the Slim Fast shakes, again too high in sugar. I had only 1 today and I have 2 more ready-made bottles left. I might have one of those every other day or something but they are made with normal skimmed milk and it's not good because 1. it's skimmed milk, I need semi skimmed and 2. it gives me the runs :(

The variety is already very limited and I decided to give up on 2 of the nicest tasting options today. I can't wait til I'm post surgery and it's funny but I look forward to even the 2 weeks liquids stage. Yes I'm rather fed up with the liquids already but at least I can have different varieties and flavours then.

Oxo cube is the highlight of my day, lol, how pathetic :)

Today I had:

08:00 am - Soya latte made with 300ml unsweetened soya milk
09:30 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
10:30 am - 500ml water
11:30 am - Muller light banana yogurt
12:15 pm - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
13:30 pm - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
14:30 pm - 500ml water
16:00 pm - Slim Fast raspberry ready made
17:00 pm - 500ml water
18:45 pm - 300ml oat milk
19:45 pm - Oxo beef cube in 380ml water
21:00 pm - Muller light cherry yogurt
22:30 pm - Weightwatchers peach yogurt

Total liquids: 3405ml (yay! this is the closest I got to 3.5l)
Total milk: 1225ml (~2 pints)
Yogurt: 3

10 days gone, 11 days to go. Sort of middle of the way! Night night x

Pre-Op Diet - Day 9

Today it was much better than yesterday - barely felt hungry, had more energy and didn't want to take a nap on my desk in the afternoon :)

I managed to increase my liquid intake a bit, which is good. Still struggling with the runs, I think I need to cut ready made Slim Fast bottles as well and make my own shakes with lacto-free milk. It's so practical for work though, pfft.

I find walking to work (and back) easier every day. Listening to audio books on the Audible app on my iPhone, it's become something I look forward to!

Short post tonight as I'm really knackered and it's really difficult to type with a cat sleeping on my lap and the laptop :P

08:00 am - Slim Fast cafe latte
09:30 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
10:30 am - 500ml water
11:30 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
12:30 pm - Muller light strawberry yogurt
13:30 pm - 500ml water
14:30 pm - Slim Fast ready made raspberry
15:30 pm - Decaf coffee with 100ml lacto-free semi skimmed milk
16:30 pm - 500 ml water
18:15 pm - 175 ml Oatly organic oat drink
19:30 pm - Oxo cube in 300ml hot water
20:30 pm - Weightwatchers cherry yogurt

Total milk: 1125ml (1.9 pints)
Total liquids: 3225ml

Pre-Op Diet - Day 8

I don't like Mondays and today was no exception. Started the day with an early meeting and had back to back meetings all day. Lunch time people kindly asked if it's ok to eat their lunches and some even had hot microwaved food that smelled amazing, and i sipped a raspberry slim fast, hmfff...

I was hungry pretty much all day. Is that because I had some solid food the last couple of days? I tried to drink lots of water and that wasn't too bad.

I had a few milky coffees at work, unfortunately lactose hit me again. Had to run to the loo twice. I'll have to start taking lacto-free milk to work. I never realised I couldn't tolerate milk!

Here's what I had today:

07:00 am - Glass of water (~200ml)
07:30 am - Weightwatchers nectarine yogurt
08:00 am - Glass of oat milk (~200ml)
09:30 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml semi skimmed milk
11:00 am - 500ml water
11:30 am - Decaf coffee with 100ml semi skimmed milk
13:30 pm - 500ml water
15:00 pm - Slim Fast raspberry ready-made shake
16:00 pm - Decaf coffee with 100ml semi skimmed milk
17:90 pm - Muller light banana yogurt
18:00 pm - Glass of oat milk (200ml)
20:00 pm - Oxo cube with 380ml hot water
22:30 pm - Glass of NAS squash (200ml)

Total liquids: 3105ml
Total milk: 1025ml (1.8 pints)

Night! X